tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33116498936150631792024-03-12T21:27:01.379-04:00Believe In The JourneyShe's Just Jodi... and she's just fine.The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.comBlogger162125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-41750276546847248762014-01-26T11:54:00.001-05:002014-02-26T20:25:13.395-05:00Time to be ME :-)I read the last few posts and I realized that I haven't given a proper update in a while. I am doing fantastic!I did have a health scare when I found a lump in my breast in November. It turned out to be a harmless hematoma. However, the process I went through from the time I found the lump until getting clear results was defining in my life. It changed me and the way I think about my life and theThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-16126167817202680492013-12-31T04:38:00.001-05:002013-12-31T04:38:30.052-05:00Word of The Year 2014So I realized a week ago that I hadn't picked a word to focus on for 2014. I pick a word each New Year to be the theme that I will use for creating the next step in my life. The word is like a touchstone of sorts to help me stay focused on my dreams for my future as well as what I want in the here and now. I thought about the fact that I REALLY want to start the year off focusing on my Art The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-37676338684776681772013-12-01T11:14:00.001-05:002013-12-01T11:15:46.712-05:00Our Society is so IronicIt is so fascinating to me how our society globs onto one concept forsaking all others. Take "The Cure", for example. We want to fine the The Cure for diabetes, The Cure for breast cancer, The Cure for autism. You never hear about a walk to find The Cause.I think this is a beautiful illustration of our American culture in general. We don't want to actually stop eating and drinking the thingsThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-59598799994725721012013-11-28T02:20:00.001-05:002013-11-29T00:02:56.989-05:00People Show you...I always heard that people show you who they really are during times of crisis. I guess I had never experienced it to this magnitude before.In the last week I have experienced so many unexpected reactions from so many so called "friends". Some have been exactly what I needed them to be, but too many others have surprised me with their callous behavior. Heck, one of them hasn't even bothered to The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-17536883069237763452013-11-23T00:29:00.001-05:002013-11-29T00:01:55.527-05:00Same as it ever was...I was doing such a good job staying in denial... Too bad it couldn't last just a little longer. I was finally going to tell Paul today. He never had time for me...I am spending the weekend with Wes. He took me to dinner and I met his friends that we are going out with all day tomorrow. I had some alone time afterward while he did one last run for work. That's when it hit me hard.I ended up The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-67261319234650688852013-11-19T17:17:00.001-05:002013-11-29T00:01:41.856-05:00Someone Else...I was sitting in a chair outside my house. One minute I was smoking a cigarette, thinking about all of the trivial crap that people think about. I reached up to scratch an itch. Something we do a hundred times a day without a thought.My hand reached up and before I reached the itch, I was stopped cold. I couldn't believe this thing that had entered my reality. Not this. It had to be a lie. Yes, The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-29269751944711916502013-11-10T12:43:00.001-05:002013-11-10T12:47:58.630-05:00Wow, people!Today I feel compelled to finally put some thoughts down regarding recent experiences. It's been an interesting weekend to say the least. Heck, it's been an interesting month! LolSo much major stuff has happened to me in the last few weeks, and I am still trying to process it all in my head. One month ago, I was hit head on with a situation in my family that I was not prepared for. I am not at The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-8286739986192968602013-10-16T04:26:00.001-04:002013-10-29T01:16:30.207-04:00LucyI am currently reading "John Lennon: The Life." I am about one third of the way through this long tome, and it has already deeply affected me. I have consequently been drawn to very specific Beatles songs that are in sync with my soul and where I stand on my journey.For several days Eleanor Rigby ran through my head. I began to see in pictures again, and Art was waiting to be made. Before I had aThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-10182643297272484672013-09-18T01:54:00.001-04:002013-09-18T01:54:28.142-04:00GlimpsesSurprises come in all shapes and sizes. Sometimes they are meant to stay. Other times they merely show up to give you a glimpse of something you thought you wanted, and they show you that you need to be more specific. It is time to make a list. What is it that I am looking for? Will I ever figure it out? I keep meeting people that show me possibilities. People who have pieces of the The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-7638994275569647312013-09-05T06:57:00.001-04:002013-09-05T06:57:55.272-04:00Someday...The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-88382836177173934062013-09-03T06:17:00.001-04:002013-09-04T02:15:58.945-04:00Seriously? Ugh.My weekend went nothing like I expected. I need next week more than ever. Wow.Tonight at work sucked, too. Somewhere between the usual calls and the call I hate the most, I had a short break with the guys. I poured out my heart, and let my emotions run. One sat there quietly, patiently listening. The other one wanted to fix it so he said too much.In the end, I hugged each of them and thanked themThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-35871254102859752372013-08-31T00:52:00.002-04:002013-09-03T06:12:14.110-04:00Friday Night...
So, this is where I am tonight. As usual, in the darkness of the night, I find truth. I am sitting here , alone, and I find it comforting.... it is home. I have my coffee, and my cigarettes. My friends... Coffee is always there for me. The warmth, the taste, it never disappoints.
Some days, my life is amazing. I have friends who truly love me as I am, and then... there are the men who don't The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-92061580356033948262013-08-30T04:34:00.001-04:002013-08-30T04:34:31.221-04:00I am...WISEfunintelligentHAPPYexuberantcaffeinatedEducatedwell-readARTICULATEenthusiasticopinionatedLOYALcompassionateempatheticunderstandingimpatientimpulsiveIndignantexasperatedLOVINGCrEaTiVe ANDI procrastinate REALLY, REALLY well!"It's been lovely, but I have to scream now!"The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-41038638412381580762013-08-27T19:38:00.001-04:002013-08-28T03:33:05.333-04:00Trying to TrustI'm in a thoughtful mood today. I tried to make Art again, but I wasn't feeling it. So, I decided to accept the fact that I am just in writing mode right now. So many thoughts and feelings are surrounding me these days. I decided to take a chance, open my heart to the possibility of love, and the Universe is playing along. I am curious what comes next. I am meeting new people all of theThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-80408369206671973932013-08-25T19:47:00.001-04:002013-08-25T19:48:35.741-04:00 "Take A Chance On Me"
If you change your mind, I'm the first in line
Honey I'm still free
Take a chance on me
If you need me, let me know, gonna be around
If you've got no place to go, if you're feeling down
If you're all alone when the pretty birds have flown
Honey I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best and it ain't no lie
If you put me to the test, if you let me try
Take a chance on me
(That's The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-50456677515605257772013-08-23T12:50:00.001-04:002013-08-24T01:08:11.876-04:00You were there...There is a moment when I am looking at him, just watching him do mundane things the way he would if I were not there. I smile inside and realize that I am enjoying this glimpse of who he is when no one is watching. It's as if we share a secret... And I realize that in this moment I am blessed. I tell him I am truly enjoying watching him "be him"... Naturally he laughs it off with a funny The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-76263952635520827812013-08-22T10:57:00.000-04:002013-08-27T19:06:55.674-04:00Someday~
“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-47290852621724247542013-08-22T04:12:00.000-04:002013-08-22T05:24:27.184-04:00The Appeal of an Older Man
When I was in high school, I worked at a dry cleaner. I loved it when the older guys would bring in their suits and shirts.
These were MEN. Businessmen.
I imagined them brokering deals and running businesses during the day, then taking their women out in the evening to classy places. The kind of places that give you a reason to buy a red dress and go to the salon. Dinner, dancing.... slow The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-76468591419120840672013-08-21T21:53:00.001-04:002013-08-21T21:53:16.786-04:00Music changes everything
There is so much going on in my life these days, it makes the time go by so quickly. Tonight is my fourth night of work this week and it feels like just yesterday I was standing in the pool discussing John Lennon....
I have been writing more than I have in years. Pages and pages flowing out of my pen. It feels so good to pour out my soul onto the smooth pages. I feel things so deeply and the The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-14173362996679389712013-08-20T19:35:00.001-04:002013-08-21T21:54:22.765-04:00some days alone gets lonely
Found some old posts from another site. This was from 2011. The second time I dealt with death at work. It was a very lonely ride home that day...
Today I was strong.
Today I took charge and ran the show.
Today I did a great job.
Today I am alone.
I wish someone else
could be strong
for a little while.
I am tired
and this load is heavy.
Will you carry it for me?
Will I let you?
Will you holdThe Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-61223894333722205522013-08-18T03:17:00.000-04:002013-08-18T03:17:04.567-04:00Watching the Wheels
People say I'm crazy doing what I'm doing,Well they give me all kinds of warnings to save me from ruin,When I say that I'm o.k. they look at me kind of strange,Surely your not happy now you no longer play the game,People say I'm lazy dreaming my life away,Well they give me all kinds of advice designed to enlighten me,When I tell that I'm doing Fine watching shadows on the wall,The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-53394130552687069142013-08-15T20:04:00.000-04:002013-08-15T20:04:48.276-04:00Its the Little Things...
Some days the smallest things can make you feel so good. A few days ago I received a message from a dear friend in Indy. She said she went to see Styx, and when they played "I'm Okay" she thought of me. :-) After listening to the song again, I felt so loved.
The idea that someone I really like being friends with just "gets me" on that level.... It warmed my heart.
People ask me all the time The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-20166760441142029222013-08-15T19:41:00.000-04:002013-08-15T19:42:56.064-04:00I am Ready
Life is interesting again, and I am ready to jump in with both feet! I got out of my rut, and I have made some new friends. I even had a really hot guy give me his number! LoL
Anyway, I have been spending some more time thinking about what I want right now. I know what I want my future to look like, but I haven't given much thought to " in the meantime." I decided to do some writing and take The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-41849500681407659552013-08-15T03:38:00.003-04:002013-08-15T19:43:30.841-04:00Leaning Into You
in my head
a vision of us
my heart aching
to make it a memory
I lean into you
on a sofa
your arms around me
sharing secrets safely
as we both have known
since I laughed
at your first joke
that this is safe
we have connected
And it scares us
but there is a reason
why we met
that day and no other...
I have awakened
as if from a dream
feelings I remember
so long forgotten
there is joy
The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311649893615063179.post-22405067895022547672013-07-08T02:26:00.000-04:002013-08-15T19:44:59.811-04:00...and change I did
I knew something had to change, so I began within. I took inventory of myself and realized that it is impossible for me to be truly happy, and truly ME, if I am not actively making Art. I made a promise to myself that I would work on something every day. Some days I am very productive, and some days it may be sewing one needleful of thread. The idea is consistency. For one can not truly be an The Indigo Butterflyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17378137610398340258noreply@blogger.com0